Ok.... So, I was teaching a violin lesson to a new student today. We will not discuss how the lesson went, but in the midst of it, the little sister of my pupil seemed to me to desire her own chair and was squirming around in her mother's lap. I thought, well, if she wants her own chair, I can go get her one which I suggested to her mother. Her mother replied by stating that the little girl (3yrs.) had been begging to nurse all day and asked if I would be alright with her nursing her. Of course I said yes.
BUT... what do ya''ll think of the whole issue... Nursing until what age??? I have never been a huge advocate of breast feeding but believe it is healthier for both me and the little one. However, I am not altogether sure about the age argument. Everyone believes a bit differently, and then there are the children that simply quit early! So... the floor is open for debate... Say on!
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9 comments:
I honestly love breastfeeding, it is very calming for me and baby and it's MY time with them. :) I still nurse Caleb at 20 months, but only just before bedtime, and not necessarily every night. I had almost stopped with him the month before Stephen was born and have since noticed that when I started nursing him at night his stuffy nose went away.
I don't want to nurse until my kids are old enough to beg for it during the day... but I'm still not sure when I'm cutting them off. :)
Let's see, I have nursed #1 for 8mths (self-weaned), #2 for 22mths (I weaned him), and #3 for 12mths (I weaned him also). My favorite for many reasons is weaning at 12mth and I will hopefully be doing this again. However, I don't necessarily feel that there is wrong way, just what works best for mom, family, and baby/child!!!
This is something I'm still figuring out but I do believe that extended nursing is very good for babies/children. I am still nursing Claire and she's not ready to stop. I've read a lot about the many benefits of extended nursing and are finding them to be quite true in our case. I can't say there's a certain cut-off age I'm looking at and I don't know that we'll make it to three, but I also don't believe three to be too old. The average (world-wide) self-weaning age is between 3 and 4 according to the World Health Organization. The WHO also recommends bfing until at least 2 years for maximum benefits to both mother and child. As far as weaning goes- that is a very personal choice. It can be a very emotional calming and bonding thing for the child and he/she may sincerely continue needing that to a certain extent well into the 2nd/3rd years and (for some) beyond that. Like Rachel said, though, it's up to the family, the mom, and the baby/child to decide what is best for them.
As a side-note, I've been very grateful for the ability to nurse Claire especially lately. She has been extremely fussy (I think her teeth are bothering her) late at night and waking up screaming and completely inconsolable no matter what we do. Nursing, however, is an instant calmer for her and puts her right back to sleep. We have tried other things and NOTHING works. I honestly believe that we wouldn't have gotten any sleep for the past couple nights had I not been able to nurse her back to sleep. It seems to be her only comfort at times.
Here are just some links that I've found helpful on the subject. I thought you might find them interesting.
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/ebf-benefits.html
http://www.parentingweb.com/lounge/ext_nursepage.htm
http://parenting.ivillage.com/tp/tpweaning/0,,3x5j,00.html
http://www.lalecheleague.org/NB/NBextended.html
http://www.breastfeed-essentials.com/nursetoddler.html
http://www.babycenter.com/refcap/toddler/toddlerbreastfeed/8496.html
Well...Lydia and I weaned at about 12 months when she was just down to a nighttime feeding. We slowly dropped feedings as her interest in food increased. She was totally fine with it when we stopped and we never looked back! This may sound selfish, but I was ready to have my body back by then! I too have read a lot about the benefits of "extended" breast-feeding (which means very different things depending on who you talk to!!!). Like others have said, it is a personal choice and babies have different needs/wants.
An aside: there was a woman at our church who was continuing to nurse her two year old. Out of the many nursing moms in our church, she had definitely kept it up much longer than many others. I found her case "interesting" b/c her daughter never seemed to WANT to nurse, but her mom was continually "forcing" her as she truly believed in the benefits of breast milk (which I do not deny). I guess I alwasy assumed that if you kept nursing when your child was talking and eating table food then they were still WANTING to nurse....
Considering the freezer shelf life of breast milk (2 weeks), I'm thinking popsicle trays for those hot summer days. ;)
While I've heard nothing but good things about breast-feeding at older ages, I'd be concerned if the child weren't recieving similar cuddle time with the father (snuggling in front of the TV, playful tickling, etc.).
I think if they are old enough to ask for it, you are beyond the time to stop. ;-D
Hi K,
We've not met but your husband attended my wedding celebration ages ago and you've met my husband Glenn.
My 2 cents on the matter. Scripture is silent on this issue of how long one might nurse. Biology being what it is, many women conceive somewhere in the second year post partum and find nursing the previous child more uncomfortable, and so practically speaking, nursing often ends then.
It seems a matter that there should be much grace on provided that discretion and modesty are used appropriately.
Not to pick on your friend who teased that if the child is old enough to ask for nursing it's old enough to wean, but my own daughter spoke very early and I'd not have considered weaning her at 7 months or so. How bizarre would it be to say if they are old enough to ask for a peach or a piece of bread we'd say "nope, none for you"...obviously one does want to choose what words one uses for nursing if one is easily embarrased. I tend to think that our cultural amnesia about the mammary's "function" vs just appearance is to blame on our feeling odd about children and nursing etc.
An interesting note if you like the book "Stepping Heavenward" or it's author Elizabeth Payson Prentiss...(in the "More love to thee" book) she mentions weaning her son Eddy at 2 years and 4 months (that is 28 months.)
One more thing about the age issue, when one is looking at another mother's child, one can easily feel "oh my, that child is TOO old or TOO big to be nursing"...but when one is holding one's own sweet offspring in one's arms that "child" is so often still one's own dear baby.
Of course one can be unhealthily obsessed with lactation, making it an idol, as one can be tempted to do with any good thing. It is good to consider one's family needs, one's husbands thoughts, one's health and child's health etc in making such decisions. Lactation doesn't just nourish one's child, it also burns calories for the mom, and helps with natural child spacing.
Ok, enough of a ramble from an old broad you don't know. Congrats on the beautiful blessing from God. Enjoy every moment, it goes so fast and each stage has it's joys and difficulties.
Every Blessing, Susan Nye Ferrell
Ps...sorry the spaces I put between paragraphs didn't show up making the previous post more diffucult to read.
FYI, with my own daughter (now a nursing mom herself) she seemed to wean herself, I can't recall exactly her age, around 20 months. I had "planned" to wean her at 2 if she'd not done so herself but as it happened, it was a very natural process, where she forgot one day, remembered the next, forgot the next and never looked back. Yeah my heart had a tiny tug, but it was "time."
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